Hi, I'm Austen.

I love movies.

I really, really, really love movies. More than a lot of other things.

I love watching them, thinking about them, pretending I'm in them. I love the acting, writing, directing, editing, scoring, costuming, makeup-ing, set designing, planning, behind the scenes-ing, blooper-ing...I love all of it. And if you know me, you know that one of the few ideas I have concerning what I want to do with my life is just to do movies, in any capacity. If you don't know that about me, Hi, I'm Austen. (listening to: "Stole My Heart," Little & Ashley)

Everyone eventually gets posed the question, "If you were given money to get one crazy expensive thing, anything in the world, what would it be?" ...or something to that effect. One decadent, selfish, unncessary gift for yourself. Mine would be a home movie theater. A giant room, with sinfully comfy chairs, a brain-shaking sound system, with walls covered in luxurious red fabric and old timey lamps in sconces. I want to watch movies the way I pay $12 to with a bunch of strangers. I want an entire wall taken up with a movie. (listening to: "L-O-V-E," Nat King Cole) To just be able to walk into a room, sit down, and have my senses filled to the brim with a good story...god, that's almost heaven. That feeling you get when you're vibrating from the volume, and you realize halfway through that you've had a lunatic grin on your face the entire time? I can't get enough of that.

The only problem with movies--at least, good movies--is that they're over before you know it. Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King? Those three hours were NOT ENOUGH. The last Harry Potter movie? I want the entire fucking book made into film. It just goes by so quickly once you get sucked in. Too quickly. (listening to: "Now That You Got It," Gwen Stefani) Oo, ok, I'll admit it, I can think of one other problem. Nowadays there is nothing original left in the movie business (hell, even that complaint isn't original.) It seems like every movie now is a recycled, re-told, re-done version of a book, a true story, another movie, anything. (listening to: "Did It Again," Shakira) It's kind of worrying. It also makes you wonder, is it possible for the human race as a whole to run out of new stories? I mean, how many plots and character arcs can you come up with before you start repeating yourself? Sigh, there I go, gettin' all deep 'n shit. Oh movies, is there anything you can't do?

Anyways, I felt the need to write all this because I have finally spent a day gorging myself on movies. Seriously, I'm pretty sure my muscles have started atrophying from lack of movement. I think I can actually say that this is the first time I've just spent a whole day watching movies, which is, you know, weird for me. And I would just like to say, GOD BLESS NETFLIX WATCH INSTANTLY. And god bless my mother for having an account so I could mooch off of her Netflix Watch Instantly. (listening to: "Give It Up To Me," Shakira) I finally discovered it yesterday (Whyyyyy did it take me so goddamn long? Why?!) and I wrote up two post-it's worth of movies I aim to watch and fiiiinally cross off my "Movies to See" list, which, right now, is ferociously long. So far I've watched six, four today and two yesterday. And here I shall review. (listening to: "It's Christmas and I Hate You," Paloma Faith & Josh Weller) Ok, um, I just found a bunch more to put on the list. It's going to be a very busy summer....The Grand Total us up to 40. I've watched 6. I've already seen 6. 6 are whole seasons of tv shows. I'll post the whole list at the end, for any of the weirdos who are interested. OK HERE WE GO. (listening to: "Upside Down," Paloma Faith)

Gigantic
The reason I wanted to see this movie is very simple. Paul Dano. Paul Danoooooo. I will watch *anything* that has Paul Dano in it. Although, admittedly, this is only the third Paul Dano movie I've seen (you're next, Taking Woodstock!). It also stars Zoey Deschanel, who in this movie is like a ditzier, richer version of herself in (500) Days of Summer. It's about a guy, tryin' to adopt a Chinese baby, and he meets this other guy whose daughter is Zoey Deschanel, and he's intrigued by her, and stuff happens. Not the srongest of all plots but, hey, Zach Galifianakis has a random, unexplained chameo and subplot. So, needless to say, it was cute, it was weird, it was kooky. I enjoyed it! Um, especially since at the end Paul Dano is playing with a certain baby and my head kinda exploded, cuz it's Paul Dano...playing with a baby. Drool. (listening to: "Skinny Genes," Eliza Doolittle)

Paper Heart
Let it be known, for now and forever more, that there is in fact a female awkard equivalent of Michael Cera, and her name is Charlyne Yi. So yeah, this comedian chick decided to make a sort-of-kind-of-wait-is-it-a-documentary? documentary about love--see, she doesn't believe in it and wants to see what others have to say about it. Along the way she "meets" Michael Cera and they start a relationship. Again, cute, weird, kooky. Lots of cameos by comedians, most notably Demetri Martin, who is the most notable because Demetri Martin is a god. Anyways, something was lacking in this movie for me, but I can't put my finger on it. I just didn't enjoy it as much as I thought and hoped I would. Shrug. (listening to: "Bangarang," Pogo)

Sex Drive
Oooh Sex Drive. This is a ridiculous teenage boy comedy, and yeah, I dug it. It was immature and stupid, yeah, but it had a nice sarcastic side to the writing that made it work. Plus the actors were all relatively new (Clark Duke is a new favorite) so it didn't seem like a stale rehash of every other dickish teenage boy comedy--I'm looking at you MichaelCeraJonahHillSethRogan. (listening to: "Alohomora," Pogo) The version I watched, by the way, was the super uncut and uncensored version, so there were just, like, 20 second clips of a penis bouncing around, and every now and then you'd notice a naked model who had been edited into the background--just cuz they could. After a while you just chuckle and shake your head. Also, sometimes bloopers would just be incorporated into the movie, which made it that much easier to accept the fact that you're watching a stupid boy movie. Approved. (listening to: "Upular," Pogo)

It Might Get Loud
Just have to say, one of my favorite opening scenes [search "Jack White makes a guitar (Scene from It Might Get Loud) on youtube]. I won't start talking about it because I'll just ramble on and probably no one cares, but ooo, am I tempted to. Anywho, this movie is a documentary of sorts; basically three of the greatest--or at least most famous--electric guitarists ever are gathered together to talk about...electric guitars. Jack White (The White Stripes, The Raconteurs, The Dead Weather), Jimmy Page (Led Zeppelin), and The Edge (U2). I watched this because I'm a big Jack White and rock fan, and it really couldn't hurt to get educated, could it? (listening to: "Alice," Pogo) It probably would've hit harder for a guitarist, which I most certainly am not, but it was still interesting. Well, Jack White was interesting; right now I'm just very into the style of sound that he does very well, so that's why. Plus, it's always fun to see three ridiculously cool and famous guys bond together. (listening to: "Just A Gigolo," Louis Prima)

Gentlemen Prefer Blondes
Sooo shame on me, but this was my first Marilyn Monroe film. Prior to this I had never ever heard her singing or speaking voice, so I'm glad I finally got that done. This was just a good ol' girly guilty pleasure--there's something about that crappy old sound quality that I really like. That and the fact that all the women speak in that weird Standard American Dialect way that I had to (attempt to) learn at Carnegie Mellon. The whole thing is just eye candy: pretty boy extras, sparkling jewelry, Marilyn Monroe and Jane Russell, and ohmygodthecostumes. This movie has made it clear to me that I absolutely must take a rich-people cruise to France, for which I will need at *least* four different couture ball gowns. This just has to happen. (listening to: "Don't Worry 'Bout Me," Louis Prima & Keely Smith)

Julie & Julia
Ahmygod my favorite so far. And I'm so happy that I loved it because it's just not the type of movie I usually like, and I love expanding my horizons like that. Anyways, everyone was right, Meryl Streep is amazing and flawless in this movie. You just can't take your eyes off of her! And oh god, this movie actually made me want to cook. And be best friends with Julia Child. And blog! (which is why I'm here so very very late). But everyone in it was great, props to the casting director. (listening to: "Sunrise," Norah Jones) The whole thing just moves along very smoothly, and there's something pleasingly crisp about the way it looks, like everything's just the right amount of clean. Lovelovelove. Maybe I actually will try cooking soon. Maybe.


So, those are my thoughts on my film rampage so far. It's too late to be writing and lord knows I'm not going to read through this whole monster post to look for mistakes, so props to you for getting through it. Sigh. I cannot wait to do this tomorrow. I'm saturated for now, but I know I'm just gonna wake up hungry in the morning. And I like that.

THE LIST: Those six plus Bicentennial Man, Rocko's Modern Life, The Angry Beavers, Hey Arnold!, Ren and Stimpy, Aaahh!!! Real Monsters, Invader Zim, Up, Young Frankenstein, Paper Moon, the Graduate, Easy Virtue, Ball of Fire, Ballerina, Monty Python: Almost the Truth, In Seach of History: Salem Witch Trials, His Name was Jason, Vanity Fair, Dek Dogz, The Tracey Fragments, S. Darko: A Donnie Darko Tale, The Cabinet of Dr. Calligari, Amelie, A Scanner Darkly, Hook, Food Inc., Rachel Getting Married, Doubt, Brideshead Revisited, Matilda, Seven Pounds, The Secret Garden, Blindess, The Muppets Take Manhattan....and whatever else I find...